So anyway! I’m just going to get this out there now.

If you are not comfortable talking about bodily functions, this is not the blog post for you.

This is a post for a lovely lady called Maria, who I was chatting to on social media.

Peri menopause - and what you can do about it.

Peri menopause is the run up to the main show. That is the quick summation. You may still be having your period, it may or may not be regular as clockwork, but I hazard a guess there are other odd things going on, that you can’t join the dots with, and you would never normally link together, but the tie that binds them is peri menopause.

A few examples off the top of my head are: possible loss of confidence and increased anxiety, your eating habits will have changed and you may be feeling ravenous still after every meal, concentration isn’t what it used to be, all of a sudden your tolerance levels are virtually zero. One for me was: getting up in the morning and simply not knowing what to wear, going through 3 changes of clothes, and just feeling so bloody unfeminine.

If I had known that the added extras above in my life were the lead up to the menopause, I would have done the following:

NOT beaten myself up a the gym with high intensity classes and running too

I would have paid a lot more to the valuable food groups I was eating, and kept an eye on my portion size

Taken up yoga and pilates a lot earlier in life.

Taken myself out of stressful situations and stressful relationships that were contributing to my menopausal symptoms.

In my opinion, 2 things in life are guaranteed to possibly cause loss of friends. Redundancy and menopause. I am glad of it. My phone book is only full of people who actually care about me, and I have a much healthier relationship not only with myself, but my family. it really does show up where the weaknesses are when you don’t feel good about yourself. Who turn their backs on you in the pub to talk to someone else, because you are a non drinker and therefore perceived to be not so much fun? (wow, pubs remember them?), who remembers to send you card to say hello? Who actually asks you how you are?

Here’s the thing. A cheeky wee life inventory at the time is never a bad idea. The way to improve any area of your life, is to subtract something. When we tidy up, we subtract mess, when we shower, we subtract mess.

What I would encourage you to do is subtract STRESS from your life.

Yes folks its notebook time. 3 headings. Work / Personal / Home.

These are the areas to subtract stress from in your life. Home includes you diet and lifestyle too btw.

Every book that has ever been written about health and wellness starts with eat less crap and move more.

It’s the same for menopause, except its, eat less crap, and move BETTER.

Sorry to be blunt on the eat less crap thing but it’s true. Two hormones you need to know about are GHRELIN AND LEPTIN. Ghrelin tells your brain you are hungry, Leptin says you are full.

When women reach menopause, leptin goes on holiday and leaves ghrelin in charge. Read that again. That’s why you feel you can’t stop eating which then gives us the glorious cycle of can’t stop eating, hating yourself for it, putting weight on, hating yourself for that too, so you just keep on munching anything you can find to snack on, coz whats the point on stopping?

And now, breathe.

Take it all in, and realise that you are NOT alone going through this, and that it is absolutely possible for you to take control of your peri menopause and menopause. The kindest thing you can do for yourself and is to subtract stress from your life. That is the biggest and most important thing.

This is a blog post so I am not going to go through my entire menopause story here, I’m writing a book! Watch this space, but what I will say is this.

I went through 18 months of sheer hell with menopause when it was full flight.

I am not on HRT and have never been offered it.

I am not on anti depressants and have never been offered them.

I feel the best I have ever felt since my late 20s. I honestly do, since I finished up with the main symptoms of sweating, bloating and anxiety. I am post menopause now. I have the odd wee hot flush every now and again but nothing compared to the jumping out of bed stuff I had for 18 months. If I jumped out of bed, it meant I only had to change my jammies and not the whole bed.

I focus on my gut health and take a Boots own brand one, as well as making a smoothie with flaxseed (absolutely disgusting on its own, don’t do it) and also evening primrose oil.

I love peanut butter but very rarely have it in the house as I will just sit and eat it with a spoon.

I did the menopause meltdown properly, visited a personal shopper, and stopped dying my hair as all of a sudden it’s cool to be older. No more comments of ‘oh your grey roots are showing’ and other glorious comments that us ladies have to put up with.

Do something every day that makes you feel good. For me that is exercise, I now cycle to work and bloody love it, and also colouring in my eyebrows because yes, everything goes grey, and I felt like I was starting to lose my features.

Here is your peri and menopause to do list.

• Remove stress from your life and make it as near as 10/10 as you can.

• Plan your meals. Slimming world magazine for the win, as is bulk cooking. If you have kids stop eating their leftovers, and stop feeling like you have to cook 4 separate meals at dinner time.

There’s a new Sheriff in town.

• Not planning my meals in advance meal I will order take away and eat crap. I like the slimming world magazine, I did go to the meetings for a while and it worked but maybe it was my group but I didn’t understand the ‘omg how my calories in a glass of wine’ as if it was the be all and end off of their health. Then again, one sherry and I’m gubbed. Alcohol has never been important to me, if it is to you, expect that relationship to change. Sorry to be blunt here but it IS a depressant.

• Also, see that thing you do when you think you’ve eaten crap and feel awful so you think that starving yourself the next day is a good idea. Don’t do that. It really is messing up your gut health.

• Notice what foods and drink bring on a hot flush. I guarantee that you will have triggers. Mine are white wine (not red thank goodness), Tea (not coffee), and any food that can give me an insulin rush. Sugar, white bread, white rice, white potatoes, crisps, yes crisps. Sorry. Notice what you notice when it comes to your food. I haven’t eliminated bread from my life but if I DO eat it, its all wholesome soda bread stuff.

• Brisk walks every day and look up great classes to do on Youtube. Yoga by Adrienne and Sarah Gorman for the win. Be kind to yourself. Beating yourself up exercising high intensity is not being kind to you.

• Dig everything out of your wardrobe that makes you feel like crap, includes that pants you put back into the drawer that make you think ‘not them today’. Get rid of them!

• Have very honest chats with your partner, kids, family about what is going on, and how they can help.

• Try not to do everything for everyone, and get good at saying ‘Can I get back to you on that?’, including being in work situations.

• Have a really great bedtime routine. Laptops off at 9pm at the latest. Lavender spray for your pillow or sprinkle essential oil. I’m not asking you to recreate Little House on the Prairie, but its all about your household having a routine, don’t let anyone rush you to do anything, from getting ready, to making decisions.

• Plan your day out the night before. Make notes because if you are doing menopause properly, everything will be in one ear and out the other!

Thats it. It’s not rocket science, but knowing WHY things are happening to you, and knowing you are not on your own is a good place to start.

Anyway, I could go on, and on, and on, and on.

Here is a chance to spend 45 minutes with me. My online course to help you get through it.

Onward!

You’ve got this.

Elizabeth x